Sufyan

I've been living in India for the past 9 months with only 18 posts to show for. Pretty sad considering the amount of experiences and events in just the past 9 months. The most recent events that erupted in Bombay these past 3 days have probably been the most intense few days we've had here in India. A lot witnessed and much more learned.

Thursday early morning we got a call obnoxiously early from my brother and dad, both wondering if we're ok. I vaguely heard bits and pieces of Asif answering the phone, saying "what!" and was probably super sleepy and confusing and going back to sleep. Later in the morning, we found out that the night before havoc had hit Bombay.

Just 3 months ago, we were able to experience the hustle and bustle and rich culture of Bombay, India. We had the opportunity to attend a Shia Bohri wedding near an area called Behndi Bazaar. Throughout our 3 or 4 days in Bombay the bulk of our time was spent in Colaba, where terror struck. It was quite eerie watching the Taj set ablaze and hear of dead bodies inside restaurants, rooms and hallways. We had walked around in that building and also enjoyed a nice lunch at a restaurant in there as well.

But it doesn't matter what my transient experiences were in Bombay...these horrific events hit hard on the hearts of most Bombayites and Indians. A co worker of mine was affected intensely, she is from Bombay and couldn't stop watching the news and thinking of how she had spent so much of her school and college life in Bombay and in particular Colaba, which is known for its popular entertainment, food and art. Luckily, her friends were ok but all were hit emotionally.

Last nite at dinner, the conversations that dominated the dinner table was: how could this happen and what's wrong with the system. How can a few men enter India via sea to wreak havoc so easily?

Today, in the car, I was having an interesting discussion with Ravi our driver. Ravi is a stark contrast from our previous driver (which I blogged about). Despite my cynicism and suspicion towards him, he's been extremely honest and vigilant about every thing he's done for us...from being on time to returning petty change back after a grocery run. He was expressing his own frustration...that all this mess is only b/c of the government and its own inner corruption. Last night, he had to drop a few friends off and at 1 am he was stopped in the middle of the road for an inspection and asked why he's out so late. He was frustrated with the questions and incompetency and corruption of the police in Bangalore and how they can be bought so easily. He showed me an article in the kannada paper about how a few police officers were charged with corruption charges, they made millions in just bribery and bought multiple homes, bars and movie theaters. He told me about how when thieves are caught, the cops take the stolen goods, give the thief a small slap and let him go. He was frustrated with how things were and how dishonesty runs rampant in this city and country and wonder what a common man can even do to attain justice if the ones who are in charge of justice are so rotten. He then went on to tell me of other drivers who work for Google and how they function. When sent to the store to buy something for their employers, the item will cost 10 rs but he'll tell his employer that it's for 30. He comes back happy that he's made profit off of his own employer. Ravi asks him what will happen when your employer finds out? The other driver does not care, he'll find another job...big deal. Ravi's lost hope in change.

Life in India's been good overall, great food, great shopping, I love my job and like being near grandparents and rich cultural experiences. Living long term here though would be frustrating. There's no justice on the low levels and forget the higher levels. I think all this is a great lesson in the value of honesty. Worldly gains will never bring you that peace of mind that honesty will bring you, your livelihood and your relationships.

May God guide us and keep us on the way of the Rasool (s), the way of truthfulness, love and justice.

Meena the RJ

I heard this very inspiring story a while back at work about a girl named Meena.

It just so happened that Tania and Sandeep Khosla (the two owners of our company and the company in our building) visited a family for dinner. Meena was a cook who was darned in the traditional Indian garb: shalwar kameez. They found her to be educated and pretty intelligent, so they invited her to work as a secretary at TSK Design/Khosla Associates.

She showed up to work on her first day, dressed up in professional corporate attire...
She ended up being a great secretary and even helped the graphic designers by taking the time to learn design software and helping with production aspects of the design work. Her hard work and inquisitiveness helped her move on to another larger company where she was a secretary.

Now, apparently, shes a successful Radio Jockey at one of the top radio stations in Karnataka. She's married, has a child, more money than her husband...and is literally supporting her own family.

Bombings & Weddings

Living away from the US of A has its perks and it also comes with an immense sense of insecurities and shocks...whether it be plain and simple safety issues or even cultural ones. July 25th, we left for Ahmedabad to get to Asif's cousin's wedding in Himmatnagar (a town a couple hours from Ahmedabad).

That Friday, as I was leaving work, a co worker informed me of a few explosions that happened around the city and warned me to leave early and be careful. The news didn't really register properly in my head...I just didn't understand what explosions in my own city implied. I got in the car and let Asif know...we went straight home since we felt like we had a little time to get to the airport. As we freshened up, the bombings were all over the news. Apparently there were blasts all over the city where Bangloreans frequent. One of them, was less than a mile away from our home, a hospital. Another, was a mall, which I would go to more often if it were closer.

Luckily, none of the areas that were hit were on the way to the airport. We got there safely and got to Ahmedabad safely as well.

The next morning, we left for Suhail's wedding which was another cultural experience/surprise. Himmatnagar is a dominantly Muslim village which I noticed to be very different than the village Asif's immediate family resides in. While Visnagar (Asif's grandfather's town) is also a Muslim village, its culture is extremely conservative. This affects everything from the way of dress, food, customs and even language. Himmatnagar tuurned out to be a much more relaxed village where the women enjoyed very fashionable clothing, rode on motorbikes and were very educated. Despite the "modern" way of life, the culture here was also very complex and full of intricacies which were illustrated throughout the entire wedding.

The wedding consisted of countless rituals and customs, from a mandatory circle of friends for the bride and groom to the pranks that each side plays on one another to the bride staying at her mom's home 4 days after the nikkah and coming home to her husband at nights all dressed in her wedding garb. It was a very interesting 3 days as well as a hot, sticky and tense one.

The day of the Nikkah, we received news that there were bombings in Ahmedabad. Later that night, we learned there were around 20 bombs. This of course was extremely unsettling news, especially since all roads into the city were blocked and Asif and I needed to fly back Monday morning.

Obviously, we're ok, all are well...and we got home safe. But the events of that weekend still linger in our mind and caused us to feel very unsafe and not welcome. As Americans, we feel safe and never felt the need to fear such threats. We especially feel this after having these incidents happen very close to home...literally. Despite our terror alerts and the ridiculously long and sometimes discriminatory security checks at our airports, there was always a sense of security and peace we felt in the US. Unfortunately, this security has been snatched away to the core here in India...and taking real precautions is a reality.

Updates

I haven't written in a while...so here are some updates of our past few months in India.

Kerala

Asif and I went to Kerala for a few days last month. It was awesome. It's the southern most part of India and it's extremely lush and green. It was raining when we got there but that didn't really dampen our trip ;) We spent 2 days in Cochin where we were the only people staying at our hotel..the Malabar House. If you ever go there, I highly recommend staying here...the staff was friendly, the place was super clean and the food was great. The monsoon season keeps people from coming to Kerala but Kerala is quite pretty despite the rain.


We hung out in Fort Cochin where there was a tremendous amount of history. It's a quaint little island where you can see churches and a little nook in the island called Jew town. We met a south Indian lady who made yamakahs. It was so strange to meet an Indian Jew but very cool. We didn't get to see the synagogue inside, it was closed but it was very cute from the outside.

Our auto rikshaw guy took us to the Muslim area in Fort Cochin...some of the oldest mosque's of India are located here. A few hours north of where we were, the first mosque in India is located there (we didn't know this until after we came home).

Our 3rd day, we went to Kumarakom and boarded our houseboat in which we spent a night. It was gorgeous passing buy little towns and homes who live on the banks of the canals. People's lives revolve around the water. Little canals connect people to each other's homes and even grocery stores and schools. We saw little school kids going home on a boat, and a man transporting coconuts to sell. We saw women washing clothes in the river too. It was pure rural India. Anyone who comes to India...must come to Kerala.

New Job
I landed a new job. I love it, it's at a company called TSK Design. Great people, great fun but most of all very nice work. I hope to learn a lot here and go home a new aesthetics and design awareness.

The Dark Knight


Who would've thunk we'd see The Dark Knight in India of all places. We got super lucky and got hook ups from my co worker to see the Premiere the night before the release. It was great. We got there half an hour before the show of course. We gave the usher our passes, while he proceeded to tear them, Asif dove into panic. He decided not to tear it. hehe.
We watched the movie with 3 Malyali guys behind us. One of them got on his cell and decided to have a conversation DURING the movie while the other kept kicking my seat. Despite all the distractions, nothing could tear us away from the screen and we left the theatre in complete awe of Christopher Nolan, Christian Bale and most of all, Heath Ledger. What a performance.

2008 Democratic primary in 8 minutes

The Cotton Candy Biryani Kid

Jaipur Bombings

Last night, as I was dropping my cousin Umair off at the airport, I saw a glimpse of this horrendous mishap that happened in Jaipur on tv. There were 8 blasts in a bazaar in Jaipur last night, killing nearly 80 people (Times of India says). As I was reading the NYT report, it highlighted the individual lives that have been affected, one of a 4 year old girl who was boarding a rickshaw and lost her entire family...as she was the only survivor.

This was today's front page news here, while it was a small little headline on the NY Times. If I were back home in the States, that's how I would have viewed it too. It's striking how perspectives change depending on your location on the planet.

Please pray for the victims in China and here in India...

Ads

Yesterday, as we were walking through Bangalore Central...

my desi pedi(cure)?

The spa experience is a time every woman looks forward to. The timing for these excursions are meticulously planned so you can be pampered at the right moment in life, either after a big ordeal in your life or just a girls outing where you can chat and enjoy being a girl or a day where you just want to leave feeling good about yourself.

Today was my spa excursion for the first time here in India. I felt like treating myself to a nice pedicure after almost 2 months living in India and enduring the major changes we've had to make during our time here...especially the damage to my feet.

So off I went to the Shahnaz Husain spa in Bangalore. Shahnaz Husain is one of the leading Ayurvedic, luxury brands here in India. Based in Delhi, she's put out an amazing assortment of various ayurvedic oils, masks, shampoos, make up, you name it out to the Indian public. I thought, what the heck let's do this and pamper little old me.

While driving there, I was dreaming of a nice relaxing hour in a beautiful spa. Instead, I walked into the spa and was greeted at the desk by a man about my height who looked quite malnutritioned. He took me into a room and grabbed whatever chair he could get and placed a makeshift ottoman in front. A woman brought in water in a tub which didn't look very sanitary. He then explained that I have this regular pedicure option or I could opt for a massage chair with the foot massage attached. This option looked a little more enticing for the germ0phobe in me.

I then realized that HE was about to begin doing the pedicure on me. I thought, "nuh uh" no way. I told him to find me a female pedicurist, after all only a girl knows how our feet ought to be. (sorry to all the male pedicurists out there)

I'll spare all of you the nasty details of my nasty pedicure. My feet needed a lot of work and the woman did it wonderfully and meticulously. It wasn't the oh so luxurious experience you usually get but the end result was exactly what I wanted: clean...which I never get back home b/c pedicurists are too afraid to get dirty.

I haven't experienced other spas in India yet, but so far I get this feeling that luxury in India doesn't equate to sensory experiences....yet. It means getting the job done and right and what you pay for. I guess...this remains to be explored.